The Expert's Mentor Who Started Out An Expert At Nothing At All with Jim Cathcart | 260

Max Nijst: Welcome to the Fearless Happiness Podcast, where we showcase phenomenal individuals who have overcome serious traumas, life obstacles, and challenges to find their own path to fearless happiness. Listen as Max Naist invites guests from all around the world to share their experiences and spread strength, hope, and faith. This is the Fearless Happiness Podcast. And this is Max Naist. All right, everybody. Good morning, good afternoon, or good evening wherever you are in this world. This is Max from the Fearless Happiness Podcast, coming to you again from sunny Southern California. Actually, it's San Diego County with another special and amazing guest. Yes, I know I call my guests all special and amazing because they are. But I have Jim with me today. But what I like to do, Jim, is have you introduce yourself, like who you are. what it is you do and then you and I are gonna rock and roll. Okay. Well nice to be with you. Thank you, Max. ⁓ my name's Jim Cathcart, C A T H C A R T. And I'm ⁓ mentor to experts. People who are like coaches and speakers and authors and specialists, advisors, consultants in b in particular fields. Not not one only, but in across a broad variety of fields, and my company, Cathcart Institute, certifies people as a certified professional expert. I've been a professional speaker for 50 years, full time. I've delivered 3,500 paid convention speeches all over the world, 25 major cities in clim in ⁓ China, most ⁓ the countries in South America, ten times to Australia. all over Europe and every state in the United States. I've written twenty-seven books and among professional speakers I've received every major award they give. And I mean that sincerely across categories. ⁓ Toastmasters International Golden Gavel, the Cavot Award, Speaker Hall of Fame Award from the National Speakers Association. I'm past president of that group. So I could rattle on all day and people say, wow, hoo hoo, you know, I mean you're a big deal. That's not important. That just establishes my background and my point of view. I'm just a guy who happened to find his lane and had a very good ride and I'm still riding. I was in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia speaking day before yesterday to eight hundred people for five hours through a interpreter, and I'm back home now. And riding my motorcycle and playing guitar and singing in clubs and and writing books and having a great time. I love it. You're living the dream life, right? Like anybody here listening is right. Jim has traveled the world, continues to travel the world, and has become the expert to the experts. So this is like I think I'm an expert. Now I have someone I can go to if I need assistance and Jim. And twenty seven books, that's that's amazing, right? So like I even said, like I said before we started, Jim, like thank you for being here and doing me the honor of being here because for me it's very special that I when I get guests like yourself that have the expertise and mentor people that are like experts to me that I would go to, right? 'Cause then they say, Wait a minute, let me go to gym, Jim would know the answer. And for me, if you if And we'll talk a little bit after, but if you knew my background, I shouldn't be sitting here with you today talking about all the wonderful things you've done and having you on my show, which but that's why I'm saying I'm really grateful that you're here. And we can't wait to to dive in and get to know you even more. So what I like to do though, Jim, is have you talk about like your backstory. What are some of the challenges that you faced, you know, whether it was growing up into teens, adulthood that Have shaped who you are today. Sure. I grew up in Little Rock, Arkansas. My dad was a telephone repairman. Mom was a homemaker, had a little sister, and my grandfather w had a stroke in his sixties and never spoke or walked or moved out of bed again for seven years before he died. And he was in our front bedroom and my grandmother took care of him and my mom took care of Me, my little sister and my grandmother and grandfather while Dad was on the road as a telephone lineman for a few years. And so I grew up expecting a very ordinary life. We didn't know anybody who had money, nobody in the family had a college degree. I we didn't sit around and talk about books or news or things like that. ⁓ dad served in the Army in World War II. He was a ⁓ mil an officer in the ⁓ army in the South Pacific, Guadalcanal, the the Philippines, all that. So, you know, he had a distinguished military career. But he was in the National Guard at during the time I knew him. And ⁓ I figured since I was an average student and not an athlete, and all my friends were you know, their parents were blue collar workers. that I grow up and work in an office somewhere or do something blue collar, you know? And totally fine with that. ⁓ although I had dreams of big thing, I didn't figure those dreams would ever get activated. And so I think when I got married in nineteen seventy, and to put this in context, I'm seventy nine years old today. Okay. So in nineteen seventy I was twenty three. And I got married and we had a baby the next year. And I was working as a clerk at the urban renewal agency, the Little Rock, Arkansas Housing Authority, for five hundred bucks a month. And I had done everything under the sun in the past. You know, I'd driven delivery trucks, I had shoveled dirt and gravel, I had worked in a concession stand in a drive in movie, worked as an orderly in a hospital. Man, I you know, I had ⁓ I I worked for Hallmark cards going around and and d ⁓ straightening up card displays and drug stores. I I delivered and sold donuts door to door. I had a paper route, you know, whatever would earn money, mowing lawns. I went to college for two years but flunked out. I didn't flunk out because I was stupid. I flunked out because I was lazy. Because I partied too much. And ⁓ so, you know, I could have passed, I just didn't take it seriously enough to do so. And so here I am married, fifty pounds overweight, smoking two packs of cigarettes a day, working for a government agency, and I hear the radio in the next room, and there's a show like yours. This was before podcasts. But it was a five minute show called Our Changing World. And the man on that show was Earl Nightingale, the Dean of Personal Motivation. Yeah, I've heard of him. Yeah, he was on nine hundred radio stations all over the world. And I heard him that day in the next room and he said something that completely rearranged my belief system and changed the direction of my life. He said if you will spend one hour extra every day studying your chosen field, in five years or less you'll be an expert in that field. And I thought, no, wait a minute. Hour a day, let's say five days a week, fifty weeks a year, over five years, yeah, that's twelve hundred and fifty hours. Even I could become an expert at something if it was narrow enough, you know, if it was something wide like real estate. I'd know a lot about real estate but I wouldn't be an expert. But if it was if it was selling commercial real estate in in downtown locations, I could become the expert on that in five years, right? Right. If it was teamwork, that's too broad, but teamwork in crisis situations for business people. Yeah. In five years, that would be a very useful and and ⁓ marketable expertise. So I thought, what do I want to be an expert at? I don't know. Not urban renewal. nothing I've ever done in the past. And then it hit me, I want to do what he does. I want to be like Earl Nightingale. Well I didn't know what that meant, but it felt right, you know? And I said, so if I study like personal development or whatever you call his field every day. For five years, fanatically, fanatically. ⁓ I'd in five years I'd really know my stuff. So I started doing that. I started reading books like Think and Grow Rich, The Power of Positive Thinking, How to Win Friends and Influence People, you know, all the classic books that were available at the time. And there were only a handful of. Today there are there's a moving van full of ⁓ you know, but back then there were six. So I read ⁓ all and I mean I read ⁓ I didn't just finish the chapter. I understood the chapter before I finished. And I started listening to cassettes and records and it's anything I could. And I got around people that were into personal development and I joined the JC's Junior Chamber of Commerce. And back then they had three hundred and fifty thousand members and and ⁓ they were in every community. ⁓ today they're pretty much disappeared. But the purpose of JC's was leadership training for young adults. Okay. So I joined a brand new chapter in my neighborhood and we would go do projects in the community like raising funds for a injured athlete or renovating a neighborhood park or whatever, again, those kind of things. Right. To do them, the purpose was leadership training. So we had to write out plans in advance. Submit it, get it approved, then do the project, and then do a summary of what we learned from it, whether it succeeded or failed. And so that the way the whole J C's experience was structured. I went to wait for this four hundred J C's meetings in two years after work. Wow. For for Yeah. My chapter only met, you know, w once a month. But I went to four hundred JC's meetings in two years all over the state of Arkansas. And I learned so much that I became the state chairman in charge of leadership training program. And so ⁓ my first year I was just going out and attending meetings and soaking things up, giving reports and things like that. Second year, I'm leading group discussions and training programs. Third year, I'm one of the most popular. speakers in the state that the chapters are saying, come speak to our group and tell us what you've learned. Fourth year and fifth year, I was a big deal in that little world. Right. So my work changed. All this I'd learned through the JCs started showing up in my work at the Housing Authority. And they promoted me from clerk to assistant to the board of directors. Gave me a rape, gave me a corner office, elected me president of the ⁓ employees association. You know, so put me in charge of dog sounds in the background. I love it. I love it. ⁓ And so I ended up able to leave the housing authority and go into the field of training and development, selling training programs full time. And then I got a call from US JC's national headquarters, and they said move to Tulsa, Oklahoma, and become the national chairman in charge of leadership training for three hundred and fifty six thousand people. Now, pause for a second. I heard a guy on the radio, he said it'll take you five years to become a national expert. That was January of 2000 or 1972, January of 1972, I'm on the radio. September of nineteen seventy-five, I was the national program manager in charge of leadership training for 356,000 people. I started with no knowledge in that field and ended up being the national expert in that niche. Today, I've given a speech in every state in the nation. And I've written twenty seven books. I mean, w what? That's unbelievable. I mean, if I'd been a student and graduated at Harvard, okay, yeah, of course. But I was an ordinary guy from the neighborhood, you know? I mean my high school classmates looked at that and just said, Where'd that come from? Right. But you proved that it doesn't have to be a graduate from Harvard to be a nasty Right. What do you what you showed up me, at least listening to you and talking to you right now, is that if you have enough drive and will and then go do the work, you can accomplish anything you want. Absolutely. Right. You may need help, but that's okay. Everybody needs help on something. So do what you're good at and get better at it and what you're not good at, find a friend or outsource it. You know, or buy some software. I I mean, yeah, like today we can buy software that will help us, right? Yeah. Back then, if we were like when you were starting, I would have to call you up on the phone and say, hey Jim, can we set up a meeting? I need your help. And then you could say and you know, this is how to win friends and influence people. First edition. That's that's what we had back then. Right. How to handle an argument. How to ⁓ how to avoid enemies, how to how to get cooperation from other people. You know, that's it wasn't taught in school. Right. And that's a very famous book, right? And and famous author and ⁓ but I'm so glad you're here, right? Because a lot of people, like me included, at one point would say I could never be like Jim. There's no way, right? Because But you have proven to us like in how you did it, like if we want to do something, we find a plan, we find a way to do it, and then along the way, like you said, we ask for help. Yeah. Like and you pay your dues. In other words, you do the hard ⁓ demeaning, embarrassing work that i when you have to in order to get to a position where you don't have to do that so often. You know, like last week I had Now you know, people could say, okay, you've arrived, it you know, your life's all r roses now. No, it's not. ⁓ but I do have wonderful moments. Because three days ago I was on stage speaking to 800 people, all of whom speak only Chinese, Mandarin. And I was in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, and I spoke for five hours through a translator who was standing beside me. And And hit a home run, got a standing ovation, you know, just it was fabulous. They treated me like royalty. Well, here's the backstory on that one. They booked me to do this and everything was set and I was all ready to go. And it's a week before the engagement, and I'm looking through and confirming details on the travel and all that. And I I see this little note that says in order to travel to Malaysia, you must have an ⁓ a passport That doesn't expire anytime in the next six months. Well, my passport expired one month after the trip. ⁓ wow. I thought, ⁓ man, I better double check this. So I did, and they said, no, can't travel. And the airlines will not let you on board if that's the case. I said, ⁓ I got a super, super, super problem. ⁓ so I called around and and got advice and and went to the ⁓ State Department, you know, the customs and i immigration people and passport office. And they said, Okay, you're in Austin, Texas. closest passport office to you would be Houston. Well, that's a three or four hour drive. One way. And and I said, Well, I'm leaving day after tomorrow. And they said, Well, you better make an appointment and get your butt over here. So I I I'm thinking, all right, how do I do this? And I ran I find out it's the time frame is so tight that what I've got to do is I've got to get my wife to go with me, get up at three AM and drive to Houston, be at the passport office when they open the doors, go in, make my appointment, which was at like nine AM, and wait three or four hours for them to issue my passport, if they do at all, and drive. back and have her drop me not at home at the airport to leave to go to Malaysia with my new passport. Right. So all right, I book all that and my wife agrees to it. And then I get an email. Notice Houston Office of Passport is closed because of a problem with the building. You know, maybe the air conditioning shut down or or the bomb threat or who knows. Wow. So ⁓ my God, now what do I do? So I go back to the Passport General website and I find they've got one in Dallas, which is three and a half hours the other way, driving. So I'm calling around ⁓ I try to change my travel, which is American Airlines from Austin to Dallas and then Cafe Pacific from Dallas through Hong Kong to Malaysia. And I call American, no, we don't have any flights that early in the morning. Okay, so I booked my own flight on Southwest at five AM. My wife takes me the no, I took a U Uber to the airport in the in the dark, got there, boarded my flight and flew to Dallas, got to Dallas, it's still dark. Wow. Got an Uber to the passport office, and of course they're not open 'cause it's still dark. But there's a hotel a block away and I've got my luggage with me. So I go to the hotel lobby and I sit there and sip coffee and have a g you know, pastry and wait for the passport office to open. It opens. So I go down the street an hour and a half before my scheduled appointment. And I just go in and it's like the DMV. And I sit down and I take a number. And pretty soon I get to the window and I say, Man, am I glad to see you? And the woman behind the counter said, Why? And I said I told her the story. She said, You see your paperwork. And she said, Well, looks like it's all in order because you've gone to a drugstore day before yesterday and got a passport photo and you've got this and that and the other. ⁓ yeah, we can probably do this, but it'll probably be four or five hours before we can get it done. And I said, Okay, where can I go? I don't know. So I go downstairs to the cafeteria. And in their cafeteria, I just sit and do email for like two hours. And then I get bored, so I go into an empty room nearby and I do push ups. And and then I come back and I go in and order some lunch. And then finally I'm thinking, you know, heck, I'm gonna just go hang out upstairs again. So I go back, take another number, and the minute I sit down, calls my number. Yes. So I go to the window and she says, What do you want? I said, I've got a passport application that's being approved and I need and I look down and she's got a stack of papers in front of her and the one on top is my passport. Thank you, God. Right. And so she gives me my passport and she says, if it's accurate, you can go. So I grab another Uber and I go to the airport and I got seven hours to wait for my flight. Wow. And I get on my flight at 10 PM and I fly to Malaysia and all that stuff. Good Lord. You know what a luxurious life I have, right? But here's the thing I want everybody to understand. See, he was willing to do whatever it took, right, to meet his commitment, right? Which ⁓ what I say is like I've heard so many times, you gotta learn to get comfortable being uncomfortable because it's not a easy ride, right? It's not a straight shot from A to B. Sometimes you gotta go over here, down here, back up And I'm seventy nine years old. I've got every excuse in the world if I want, you know. Right. And get off their butts and do something. You know what I mean? I ⁓ Did you hear he did push ups? He didn't just sit around. He did he worked on his emails and then he went and did push ups. I love it. I'm that's I knew this was gonna be a great conversation, right? Because I deal with people sometimes, Jim, right, where and I get it, right? They're coming because I've worked in the addiction field for almost sixteen years and I love it. It's my passion, right? And but there's times where I know someone, you know, no matter ⁓ you know, hey, I'm gonna do this with you, but I need you to do your part, right? And they don't want to do anything. You know, it's like, you're not gonna do it for me. Like, wait, what do you what what you don't do? I want to. I I said, Do you think someone went to school for me to become a counselor and then I got the certificate and said, Hey, I'm here, right? That's like you saying to them, look, your muscles are too weak. I'll look I'll go lift some weights for you. Exactly, right? But I I love this story because it shows, right, like your strength, your character, and it teaches all of us, like, like if we're willing to do half what Jim did for that day, like we're still gonna accomplish some big goals, right? But like I like Napoleon Hill, like one of the stories where Edison's right hand man leaves his home state, right, with the clothes on his back, gets on a train, and like you said, he walks into Edison's office and says, I'm gonna be your right hand man, but I'll do whatever. And he says, Okay, you're gonna start at the bottom, right? Like you're gonna go do janitorial work. Yep. First edition, think and grow rich. ⁓ you those are like classics, but you see what I'm saying? Like, and you proved even you didn't have to do all that, right? You could but you made a commitment and you said, Look, I'm gonna I'm gonna this has gotta happen. I gotta make it happen and I'm gonna do whatever it takes. But that's like with anything good in life, right, Jim? Like if you want to accomplish a goal, you have to put a plan together and also have to be willing to pivot and you know what I mean? Make a U-turn and then go back and do some thing. You know, th people need to lose the word try because d if they try something, they're not committed to the outcome. They're sampling it. You know, I can take a taste. Yeah, that's pretty good barbecue, but I'm not gonna buy any. Okay. Right. But if you say I'm having barbecue tonight, that first taste wasn't particularly good. Let's put some extra sauce on there and let's let's you know, and all of a sudden it tastes good. ⁓ when I got to Malaysia, my client, there was a whole bunch of ⁓ like twelve people that met me with a big banner, welcome Jim Cathcart and had my picture on it and all that. had had it in Chinese and in English and ⁓ they had a big bouquet of flowers and it w it was amazing. Well I at at the airport they were saying, you know, we're so thankful that you've made the commitment to come. ⁓ and they were just chatting with me and they said, we understand you do push ups. I said, Yeah, but I've been on that airplane for twenty five hours or whatever it was. And ⁓ they said, Well how many push ups do you do? And I said, Well let's see and I just dropped right there in the airport. in the midst of all the luggage and everything and did fifty push ups. And and it blew their minds. And it got me revived from sitting on the plane all that time. So then we went to the hotel and at dinner, my host, the guy that hired me to come over there, he said in Chinese and and I heard it through translation, I was so worried that you wouldn't make it that I said a prayer to God That if he would help you get here on time, I would not eat beef for the rest of my life. And he was sitting there at the meal taking beef off of his plate and pushing it aside. I had no idea what an emotional experience this was for my client. If so, I would have tried even harder. Well, I mean, here's that integrity thing that I've been taught, right? In my recovery, right? You did what you said you were going to do when you said you were going to do it. And that means the world to people. I know as a father and grandfather, I I want to live by that. Value, you know what I mean? Because I have kids and then grandkids, you know, that like they say, you never know who's watching, but they're watching, right? So if I'm not doing what I say I'm doing when I say I'm gonna do it, they're gonna go, Well, grandpa doesn't do it, why should we do it? Like you know what I mean? Yep. And right, and like I be honest, everybody, Jim and I were like going back and forth on the emails because we got a little mix up, but like Jim, I said, You know what, we're gonna do this, right? I Put it in his court. And he said, Nope. Send me the link. We're gonna do this. And I said, Damn, right? Okay, cool. I like this guy already. Like he's he's up for the challenge. And but this is how I learn is from gentlemen like yourself. This is who I try to surround myself with now, you know, as I get older and wanna accomplish the things that I want to accomplish in my life, because I need to one, you're my example now of what two do, as they say. Yeah. Right. Because I've been in I've been in plenty of a plenty enough AA meetings where my sponsor would say, You're gonna watch what to do and you're gonna see what not to do. Right. So I've I always love watching what to do because I know that if the people are leading by example, they're giving me something that I can try and okay, you're right. Okay, something that I can do and and make things happen for myself, right? Like right. Because here's a perfect example. My mentor and coach when I was starting my private practice and we belong to a mastermind group and I've shared this before and I love sharing it because it's he he got me really good. I said, Well, I'm gonna start a podcast, right? And he was like, Okay, he didn't make a big fuss, but every week when we'd meet, he would always ask me, Max, how's that podcast going? Well, I'm trying this or I'm trying and he he wouldn't say anything until it was God rest his soul. About two or three weeks before he passed of COVID, he asked me on a call and he said, Hey Max, how's that podcast going? I go, Well, I'm learning how to edit. And before I could finish, he was like, and this gentleman never cussed, but he's like, Effin, Max, perfect. Doesn't mean done. Just do it. And here I am, 215 episodes later, on a great now on a on a new episode that's going to come out with an amazing human being that I've only got to meet for the last 30 minutes or so and and already just know. But he's teaching me and he I hope he's teaching you because you're bringing a lot of value to to my audience on not only resilience but like willingness. J the action part of life where you just have to do it. I've had people say to me, look Jim, I would set a goal for something but but I don't know how to do it yet. Well excuse me, but that's the point. If you know how to do it, it's not a goal, it's a to do. Right. A goal is something you dream about, want, wish for, plan for, intend to do that you don't yet know how to accomplish. And when you commit to the outcome, the pathway will emerge, but only if you're traveling it. Right. So not not if you're waiting for the answers to come to you. You gotta go start doing something, and then you'll see a better way. And then somebody'll give you an idea and it'll change your approach. And then you'll meet somebody. And you know, it's kinda like i i if you go wanna go from San Diego to Fallbrook and you don't have a map, can you find Fallbrook? Well of course you can. As long as you look for the Fallbrook signs. You know, you gotta get on Interstate 15, you gotta go on up going through Escondido and on out there, and then you're gonna have to turn off because it wanders back through the hills. But enjoy the scenery 'cause it's a beautiful drive. And ⁓ well, where's that related to Temecula? Just travel. Get on the road and exploring for heaven's sake. You know? I've ridden all those roads on a motorcycle hundreds of times. And it's a wonderful place to ride a motorcycle. Well, and as you know now too, Temecula's not just a desert anymore. It has grown so much. And you know what I mean? Oceanside, Vista. The whole area has grown so much. I love Fallbrook 'cause it's a piece of like a small town vibe. And not but I hate to say it, like everybody cuts through our town because you know they're coming from Temecula to go to Vista or Oceanside and it's like, ⁓ traffic. But You said it right. Like ⁓ you know, people say like I gotta I got a goal, but they if they don't put a plan together, then it's only a dream, right? But a dream comes and the putting the plan together, you know, you don't have to have a plan to get all the way to your goal. All you gotta do is have a plan of where to start your journey. Right, right. Like if you know your goal is west of you, then go west till your hat floats, right? Just Just g where w which direction should we go? Well hello West. Well what if what if we don't find it? Yet. See there's another word that's a magic word. Try is a is a three letter cuss word. Yet is a three letter gift from God. You know, I don't know how to do it. Yeah. I'm not big enough yet. I'm not smart enough yet. Nobody's ever done this yet. ⁓ you know, but the every time I tried it in the past, it didn't work. Therefore I haven't done it yet. so just start traveling towards your goal and don't give up. People st asked me early in my career, how did you know you were gonna succeed? Because I knew I wasn't gonna quit. See, and you just and that's the ⁓ did you hear that everybody right? He did not quit. And I say that all the time to people is One thing you gotta do is not quit on yourself because that's when it's gonna stop. And that's where right, we're all gonna fail. And you know what I mean? But if if you're trying and you learn you learn from that failure, you'll get better and you won't do it again, right? Exactly. I relate it to my recovery, right? Like, yep. I told I told people I'm gonna try to get sober. And I had people go, trying is lying. There's no such thing as trying. You either do it or you don't. Right. And I'm like And my only addiction personally has been cigarettes and I smoked for thirteen years and ⁓ I quit on January twenty fifth, nineteen seventy four, but who's counting? And when I quit I ⁓ d I was going through a change in my life from being the fat d s likeable loser to being a guy committed to the field of personal development. And ⁓ one of the things that occurred to me was I need to figure out what I believe. And I'm Christian. I was raised Christian, but it didn't really sink in yet. And so I started exploring and I had a friend who was a Bible st ⁓ actually a preacher. And I was I I had so little to do at work at the housing authority that I was able to read the Bible cover to cover in three months at work. In three months. And ⁓ so that started raising all kinds of questions and one of the things he said to me is, Jim, you need to get baptized. I said, Well they sprinkled me when I was a kid. Were you in on it? No. No. And you need to get baptized. Why? Because it represents washing away the old you and starting fresh. Okay, okay, I'll get baptized. So I went to my wife's church, which I didn't particularly feel connected with, and I said, Will you baptize me? ⁓ we'd love to have you as a member. I didn't say I want to join. I said I want to be baptized. Well you gotta join. So I went to my old church, Methodist church. ⁓ will you baptize me? No, we sprinkle. Well, I went around until I finally found a church that said, Yeah, we'll baptize you and you don't have to join. And so when I went to get baptized, the preacher said, What's that in your pocket? And I said, Cigarettes. He said, I know. He said, Do you want to be reborn a smoker? And I said, Well let's not let's not go there. And he said, Jim, answer the question sincerely, if you're truly starting a new life, do you want to be reborn as a smoker? And I said, Well, no. He said, Then give me your cigarette. ⁓ wait a minute. Well we're not gonna quit right now. He said, Jim, baptism is on Sunday, it's Friday. So if you're in it You're all in it or you're not in it at all. Right. And I said, Well and he said, Come on, if you're serious, quit smoking as of this moment. Ugh. Here. So I gave them to him. He watered it up. Said I always did love the smell of tobacco and then he threw them away. And I went through three days of misery withdrawing from cigarettes, you know, for three days before the baptism. And then I got baptized and I renewed my commitment to s n be a non smoker and I said, God, I'll never smoke again as long as I live. Right. Here's what that meant. Didn't try to quit. I quit forever. I gave away all of our ashtrays. And at that time everybody smoked. An ashtray was a social device that guests expected ashtrays. I put a sign on my front door that said, Thank you for not smoking here. We'll join you outside if you want to smoke. I I gave away the cigarette lighters that my mother had given me and it was engraved. And I gave it away to a stranger so it wouldn't come back to me. I got out of the smoking business for life that night and went through three months of of cold turkey miserable withdrawal, but defeated the demon, you know, and never have smoked again and never will. Yeah, I I I know that very well. Right. So when I first got sober twenty two years ago, ⁓ So I'm gonna quit. And my sponsor, of course, looked at me, he's like, No, you won't. Right. So but it took I haven't had a cigarette like you, who's counting, since December eighteenth of two thousand five. And I haven't smoked, you know, in what, twenty years now. But like you, it was like when I when I made that it was like the promise I made to God after my last relapse. It was I said this, you help you help me, God, stay off cigarettes and I promise I'll do the work and never smoke again. Just like my my rat last relapse and the audience knows that have been with me. I said, Okay, God, like if you keep me sober, I promise to do the work to stay sober. And I've been doing that for twenty two years and but I know that feeling. So I put the patch on, right? Like my sponsor had the patch because he had quit smoking. He goes, Here, I'll give you my patches. Well, it fell off about a week in. And I said, Well, hey. Maybe God didn't want me to have the patch. It came off for a reason. But then those but like you said, the withdrawals kicked in. There are people that were like, Max, we'll see you in a couple of weeks 'cause we know, you know, my poor girlfriend at the time, like ⁓ yeah. I can imagine what my wife went through. I remember her. I was sitting on the floor in our living room doing something, you know, playing with my son or something, and I said, God, I want a cigarette. And she said, Well, just don't think about it. Right. What didn't I think of that? Such an obvious answer. Right. And I know. And you're probably like, ⁓ thank you, honey. I I'll do that. Yeah. Clearly you understand. Yeah. ⁓ but I I love it, right? Because that is one of the most addictive substances on this planet, right? As we know. And ⁓ it's that's why I think the human mind is so powerful. If we put our minds to something, we can do it. Especially if, like you said, we may not have to have a whole plan put together, but if you take the first steps and then along the way you refine it and you you ask for the help that you need along the way. And which I did, right? Was there's people that I lived with that would smoke outside, obviously. And I would just I wouldn't go out to the smoking after meetings or before the meetings, right? I stayed in the front of the in front of the building where they couldn't smoke and I'm like, I'm gonna stay over here 'cause Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Just too and others, you know, they don't understand, so it's it's kinda like you go into a bar and you say, No, I don't drink. You know, they're gonna say, Hey, what are you too good to drink with me? Yeah. Obviously I'm not suited to be your friend, so I think I'm leaving now. anybody that puts that on you is ⁓ clearly uncaring altogether. By the way, I just so you know, when I was working with the JCs, I did all kinds of ⁓ dark work that most people aren't exposed to. One of the chapters assigned to me when I was a district director was the former Black Panthers chapter in Little Rock, Arkansas, Ghetto. And they had decided to become JCs instead. And I was their assigned guy. So I would go over there. I'd be the only white guy in the room with a bunch of pretty v potentially violent people. Right. And then I I worked with the prison chapters. So I've been alone with inmates in prisons in probably seven or eight prisons from Concord, New Hampshire to Fairbanks, Alaska to Cummins and Tucker prison in Arkansas to Texar Canon, Texas and other places. So, you know, I've been I've seen the the dark side of things. And ⁓ I get it how privileged we are to stay clean and sober and and smoke free and and live a life of uplifting others. Exact and I'm that's why I'm so grateful you're here, right? Because one, in a selfish way, I get to show my audience in the world, right? Change does happen. Right. If you're willing to do stuff. Yep. And there are gonna be people out there that are gonna take you in and hug you and and accept you despite your past. Right. Because I mean, Jim and I haven't talked about my past, right? But he obviously knows I was an addiction. And, you know, but but here we are today, like two men having this awesome conversation. And, you know, I get the privilege of having Jim on my show so he could share his story. I would say let's talk about your book, but let's talk. Like give me a summary of all twenty-seven of your books. I mean we we know their personal development, but like kind of dive into those for a minute, Jim. First off, the way for people to learn about what I do and what I offer is just go to my last name, Cathcart, C A T H C A R T dot com. Cathcart dot com is about thirty pages of different resources, videos, Books, a link to Amazon so you can see all my various books. ⁓ you can download a free book, but just go to free.castcart.com and you can download my book for speakers called What to Do When You're the Speaker. The one I would recommend to our listeners today is this one. It's called Mentor Minutes. And it's how to reach the top one percent of your field. No matter what that field may be. And it talks about this hour a day for five years. It talks about my story. And it has three hundred and thirty six one minute life lessons. I wrote it originally as a as a guidebook for my grandkids. And then I expanded it and turned it into a a ⁓ book for anyone who's looking for a a ⁓ guide to how do you live your life more abundantly? How do you deal with fear? How do you deal with problems? How do you become a problem solver? How do you win friends? How do you everything? Yeah. I love it. Well, I'm definitely going to get that book, Mentor Minutes, because I've always, or especially lately, as I get a little bit older, right? Want to find out like from gentlemen like yourself. Like pick your brains and go, how did you do that? Now you just gave me a book I can read and Right, because just because I'm getting older doesn't mean my dreams have stopped. I have some big aspirations and absolutely. You know, and I want to that you have dreams and suspend the fact that you don't know yet how to reach them. If you have dreams, you still have a reason to be alive. And even if your dreams are man if only, or what if, or wouldn't it be nice if? You know, those kind of dreams that's the beginning of a dream. And it's trying to find its re its expression through you. And if you just decide on your own that you're going to be a lousy portal, then the dream's not going to become a reality. Right. But we have inside us all kinds of possibilities that are seeking to become realities. And we've got to give those realities wings or or legs. You know, by if you wanna play guitar like I do, I got guitars all on the wall all around me and I play and sing in clubs and such. ⁓ if you wanna do that, you gotta learn to play. And you gotta get the calluses on your fingers and you know, which at first aren't calluses or bruises. And and and you gotta play you gotta be willing to do what you do poorly if you ever expect to do it s greatly. Right. Absolutely. And that's I see that's like the lesson I learned in jujitsu, right, when I first started. Like I had to learn that I was gonna get choked out, tapped out, guys were gonna beat me up, right? But I couldn't quit. I had to keep learning because the more I practice say a technique, like get a guitar, right? Like the better I get. And and you brought up something for me, which is and I I I'm sure you can relate, like that's the legacy I want to leave for. my grandchildren and my children is dad, you know, was a good guy, was honest, did said what he was gonna do, when he was gonna do it, but he also showed us how he never quit on anything. Like if he needed to learn something like you, like he found a way to do it. Right. And and that's And see, that has nothing to do with money. Yeah, that would be great if I could leave a fortune behind for my children and grandchildren. Money's a byproduct, not a goal. Right. And but that that goal of mine, I think, is what keeps me going, right? And keeps my dreams going. Because, like I said, like we talked about you never know who's watching, but we know who's watching. And if I can show them how, like, even when grandpa fails, he picks himself up, he learns that lesson. And then he keeps going, right? That's the lesson. I want to teach people never to quit on themselves because that's how winning is done. Right. Suggestion for you with the book. With mentor minutes, get a copy of it for your grandkids and a copy for yourself. And then just once in a while, go to them and say, Hey, get your book. And it's so you can do this on the phone, you know, get your book. Okay, go up and book. Give me a number between one and two hundred and fifty. And they say, I don't know, give me a number. Max, give me a number. I'm gonna give you my a 57. Okay, fifty-seven. So we go in the book to item fifty-seven, or you could go to page fifty-seven. But item fifty-seven, each one of these takes one minute, so here it comes. All right. Okay. How many snups? S N U P S do you have? A snup is something you do regularly that serves no useful purpose. Here are some examples of like following old habits, like watching extra hour of TV long after your favorite shows have ended, like sta stacking up your your work instead of doing your work. Right, you know, organizing in in piles and things like that. Putting off dental appointments, increasing the amount of drilling that will be needed when they come around. ignoring offensive or or dangerous behavior and ⁓ until it's too late, you know. Things like that. None of these behaviors leads to a good result. So here's some more. Saying I can't when you simply haven't figured out how yet. Telling people when they want what they want to hear instead of telling them the truth. Things like that. So try to eliminate your snups on a daily basis. They serve no useful purpose. So you can talk with your grandkids about that, about any of these things. They give you another number and you say, Okay, here's the here's another one. And it's every aspect of life, 'cause I looked at mental, physical, family, social, spiritual, career, financial, and emotional and wrote about all of them. I love it. I love it. And what a way to connect with your grandchild or son or daughter. Yeah. Through that. Like and something that's actually gonna help them grow and yourself at the same time. Yep. I love it. Did you I hope you paid attention, everyone. If you have to hit rewind later, do it because that was very important what he just taught us. Thank you. Well, my grandkids are now twenty one and twenty four. Or twenty yeah. Just turned twenty four. And ⁓ They are amazing. They are v phenomenal people. ⁓ but when they were little, I I was really intentional about helping mold their mind, their world view, and helping them see possibilities instead of focusing on limitations. Right. I love it. I love it. Because that's kind of a big goal of mine is to teach, right? Because there's so many negative things in the world that they show on TV, right? I want to do the opposite and show that. The end there's so many endless possibilities of what you can do with yourself in your life and right. And one thing for me that's kept me sober t is not only for being sober, but like anybody, like helping people get what they want, right? Is huge. Ziggler's famous line. Zig was a good friend of mine. That's one of the things one of the beauties of being in this field. I've come to know personally all these people. Earl Nightingale, I worked with Earl Nightingale. He published my recordings later on. ⁓ Zig Zigger. And Zig's famous quote is, You can get everything you want in life if you'll just help enough other people get what they want. His ninety ninth birthday is coming up. He's passed away. But his son and and family is celebrating his ninety ninth birthday soon and I'll be at that celebration. I love it. I love it. I feel like I'm in company of royalty right now when it comes to personal development. Thank you for that. But ⁓ Brian Tracy and Les Brown and Tony Robbins and all these people yeah I know all those people. I love it. So it's I've learned from the best. Yep. See, that's yeah, that's my goal is to learn from the best. But I love it. It's it's been such a wonderful time, Jim, sitting here with you and you know, listening to your story and getting to know you better. But I want to ask you the question that I do remember that I tease you about before the show. So we're gonna start with fearless, right? Yep. What does fearless mean to you and how does that show up in your life on a daily basis today? You're not gonna say I go do fifty push-ups. I'm just kidding. Go ahead, Jim. Thank you. Fear is evidence that you don't know what's out there and you don't know how it's gonna affect you, but you suspect it'll be bad, right? So fear is always rooted in doubt. It's always rooted in the expectation of bad. of darkness, not light, right? So how do you counteract fear? Well first off, fear requires ignorance in order to to sustain its existence. So im anything you fear, immediately learn about it. The more you learn about it, the more you'll see that there's less reason to fear. For example, I went into a ⁓ I I had a motorcycle accident years ago. And scraped a big chunk of my backside off ⁓ on the pavement. And ⁓ so I'm in the hospital and this nurse named Larry is picking the debris out of my butt. And ⁓ he says, this goes pretty deep. He said, if I give you an anesthetic you wanna you want us to put you to sleep? I No, no, no, no, no, no. He said, Why not? And I said, Because I I I just don't trust anesthetics you know th that aren't essential. ⁓ and he said, well I can give you a local, but it might still hurt. And I said, well let me tell you let me ask you this. Since I don't know how much it'll hurt, would you be willing would you be willing if I said so to stop for a minute if it hurts too much? And he said, Of course. I said then go ahead. So he did the local anesthesia. And he started picking the stuff out and it would start hurting. And I'd say Okay, go ahead. And then okay, go ahead. And he got through it. And there was still some deep, deep embedded asphalt when my bottom healed, and I call it my asphalt. I love it. And ⁓ anyway, I got out of that. But the point was I was afraid only when I didn't know how much it was gonna hurt. When I realized how much it was gonna hurt, I said, Well, I can take that as long as you'll pause once in a while. Well, you know what? I love that. That I relate that to my tattoos, right? Like I tell the guy, if if I need to stop for a second, you're willing to stop. He's like, Of course. So yeah, there's certain spots where you go, Whoa, whoa, whoa. Yeah. Give me give me a second. And then they say I'm afraid of public speaking. I tell ⁓ no you're not. Well, yes, I am. No, you're not. You do public speaking anytime you talk when other people are listening. Yet the dinner table and meetings, you know, th i i that's public speaking. Yeah, but I'm afraid of public speaking. No, you're afraid of being judged. When you stand up in front of others, you're afraid they're thinking bad things about you. And your problem is not what they're thinking. Your problem is your thinking. You are thinking about you when you ought to be thinking about your message and what they can do with it. I love it. Ooh, I just learned. That's that's good. Thank you. I love it. I love it. Borg in next question, happiness. And as you can see, I put a Y in it. Yep. Knowing I put a Y in happiness, what does happiness mean to you today, Jim? And how does that show up in your life on a daily basis? Happiness is a beginning of the a process that ends with joy. Joy is absolute, you know, highest level of happiness. And ⁓ joy is almost a spiritual experience, or it may actually be a spiritual experience. Happiness ⁓ begins at the superficial level. ⁓ can I have an extra a spoonful of sugar in my coffee. You know, that sugar is the superficial happiness. Right. But if if what you're after is nutrition, you don't go to the cake section of the store. You go to the meat section or the vegetable section of the store. So happiness should never be your goal. Joy should be your goal. Happiness is a step along the way. Meaning and satisfaction bring joy. When I speak in China to Mandarin speaking people who have never heard the things that you and I hear and read in these books when I'm out in the hinterlands of China speaking to a thousand b young business people, I talk about h living a meaningful and satisfying life, and they tell me after my talk. I've never heard anyone talk about that ever before. Wow. And that just that that really moves me because it I realize how profound my job is if I'm gonna inspire them. Because if I tell them something and it causes them to defy their government or to disgrace their family or dis you know, insult their family or something like that in the process of being more successful. Then I have ruined their life instead of enriching their life. So I tell them, look, you gotta respect your government because it controls everything. You gotta respect your family because you've got a legacy that you need to preserve. And you need to respect your employer because you've got a duty and obligation to fulfill your job. But you also must respect the gift that's in you and find ways to to be more of who you were born to be. And to live a meaningful and satisfying life. And with that will come years of happiness and joy. I love it. Wow. You heard that, everybody. Better like take note. ⁓ like I said, Jim, this has been a such a wonderful time, an amazing time. Thank you much so much for being here. But if my audience wants to get a hold of you or any of your books or work with you or request For you to speak, how do they get a hold of you? I'm so easy to reach. I'm on every social media under the sun. You know, certainly on Facebook and LinkedIn and YouTube and Twitter X and and ⁓ Instagram and and and so forth, TikTok even. But ⁓ the best way to reach me is Cafkart.com. Awesome. You heard that everybody. Like I said, well, Jim, this has been such a Awesome time for me. Like and such an honor. It's nice to know know yet another person in Fallbrook. I love it. And I now I have another friend in Austin. I love it. Right. And ⁓ this has been an amazing time, but you're not quite off the hook just yet. Now I get to ask you my favorite question that I ask of all my guests. And it goes like this. So, Jim, what is the one piece of advice you could give my audience to help them grow as human beings and become better people? Ask yourself this question every single day of your life. How would the person I'd like to be? Not somebody else, but the better you. How would the person I'd like to be? How would the Jim Cathcart I like I would like to be do the things I'm about to do? And then upgrade everything you do to be doing it like the future you, not the former you. I love it. I love it. Wow, this has been it ha I'm getting goosebumps 'cause that's how excited I am about this. Like this is that was brilliant and it was Thank you. I mean, thank you for the value that you just brought to myself and the audience. Amazing. Well, everybody, you heard Jim. If if Jim made you think, if Jim taught you something, if Jim made you smile, and my famous if Jim made you go, hmm, I like that. Please go to iTunes and leave a five-star review so more people could find the podcast. And come join me over on my YouTube channel and go like and subscribe so you can listen to amazing people like Jim. Again, good morning, good afternoon, or good evening wherever you are in this world. This is Max from the Fearless Happiness Podcast. Until next time. Are you tired of being weighed down by life's traumas and struggles? Join the Fearless Happiness Lifestyle and let us guide you toward a brighter future. Explore our past podcast episodes and get a copy of the Fearless Happiness book to ignite your inner strength. If you or someone you love is battling addiction or facing challenges related to unresolved trauma, know that we are here for you. Visit maxnates.org, M-A-X-A-N-A-N-A-N. N-I-J-S-T.org and take the first steps toward finding your fearless happiness. Thank you for listening. This has been a production of Fearless Happiness.